People are taking the article as being too judgemental, but she’s clearly making general comments and learning lessons from what she saw. Sure it could be different inside, but she isn’t ostracizing this couple or saying that she is doing anything to hurt them or their reputation, just pointing out glaring issues we all need to learn from. No one knows the whole truth and yet it’s important to learn lessons from what we see.
In particular her remarks about separation of the sexes is a major principle in Judaism. Whether or not this is a perfect example, the reality is that Jewish communities are littered with stories of divorces from inapporpriate relationships where boundaries weren’t kept and lives were shattered as a result.
2. Anon
5/22/2025
The amount of assumptions and judgements is baffling. You assume that he was trivial about the divorce because he likely wanted .. privacy? Not to open himself to .. idk… you, clearly? How could you make these assumptions and then broadcast them like this?! Marriage is SO SO HARD and you have no idea what happened between them because it is not your business. I hardly doubt that someone with children is deeply cavalier about breaking up their home and family.
3. Name Witheld
2/06/2025
What you’re saying is really true. But from a single perspective all I can say is that the phenomena of divorce has started becoming more and more common with increasing frequency. All of this (plus more:) is so discouraging and it makes me wonder if I’ll ever want to get married. Is the pain after the fall worth the love?
But I know that it is because that is the command of the torah and it is the right thing to do. I just hope it’s the right one the first time round. Thank You,
A very nervous single just entering the parshah.
4. Anonymous
7/07/2010
Rivka, I agree with everything you are saying. Marriage is precious and many people do give up too easily. However, you need to be careful about judging individual situations. You really have no idea what is going on. Your essay includes the story of one family. Imagine how that family might feel if they read your essay, how judged they might feel. (perhaps there was abuse or drug addiction, etc.) Many people judged me when I got divorced. They had no idea what was really going on.
5/23/2025
People are taking the article as being too judgemental, but she’s clearly making general comments and learning lessons from what she saw. Sure it could be different inside, but she isn’t ostracizing this couple or saying that she is doing anything to hurt them or their reputation, just pointing out glaring issues we all need to learn from. No one knows the whole truth and yet it’s important to learn lessons from what we see.
In particular her remarks about separation of the sexes is a major principle in Judaism. Whether or not this is a perfect example, the reality is that Jewish communities are littered with stories of divorces from inapporpriate relationships where boundaries weren’t kept and lives were shattered as a result.
5/22/2025
The amount of assumptions and judgements is baffling. You assume that he was trivial about the divorce because he likely wanted .. privacy? Not to open himself to .. idk… you, clearly? How could you make these assumptions and then broadcast them like this?! Marriage is SO SO HARD and you have no idea what happened between them because it is not your business. I hardly doubt that someone with children is deeply cavalier about breaking up their home and family.
2/06/2025
What you’re saying is really true. But from a single perspective all I can say is that the phenomena of divorce has started becoming more and more common with increasing frequency. All of this (plus more:) is so discouraging and it makes me wonder if I’ll ever want to get married. Is the pain after the fall worth the love?
But I know that it is because that is the command of the torah and it is the right thing to do. I just hope it’s the right one the first time round. Thank You,
A very nervous single just entering the parshah.
7/07/2010
Rivka, I agree with everything you are saying. Marriage is precious and many people do give up too easily. However, you need to be careful about judging individual situations. You really have no idea what is going on. Your essay includes the story of one family. Imagine how that family might feel if they read your essay, how judged they might feel. (perhaps there was abuse or drug addiction, etc.) Many people judged me when I got divorced. They had no idea what was really going on.