The 40-Year-Old Thank You

Many years ago, when David was a little boy and dinosaurs still roamed the Earth, his father, Ziskind, used to work for an installment business. Ziskind was fresh out of college and had done his Army service, and by the young age of 25 was already a father of two and making a living to support his family.

 

One of his jobs in the installment business was to go around to people’s homes and collect money that they owed. But many of the families that owed money were so poor, they lived in the slums of Chicago, in Section 8 housing. I’m talking really, really poor. Thank G-d most of us don’t know from such poverty.

 

One morning, he was making his rounds and had to stop by a family whom he had become friendly with. My father-in-law is really special in that way. He genuinely cares about being nice to people, making friends with them, and helping them out in any way he can. Don’t know why that didn’t rub off on his son, but I digress…

 

LIGHTEN UP, PEOPLE!

 

So this one family, let’s call them the Greenbergs, lived in a pretty dangerous area of Chicago for a white person to go visit. You know, I just realized the name Greenberg might not be the best fit for a black non-Jewish family. But I kinda like it, to be honest.

 

Ziskind had a nice relationship with this family, and beyond the usual duty of collecting money, he asked how they were doing and stuck around for a short visit. The daughter, who was about 17 at the time, asked him for help filling out some government forms. She was applying to college and needed someone to help her make sense of all of those complicated forms. Being that most of her family was illiterate, she had very few people to turn to.

 

He sat down with her and patiently filled out each form as best he could, because G-d knows that no one, aside from patent attorneys, can understand those ridiculously complicated forms. After they were done he was on his merry way to collect more money from other people in the area.

 

The fact that he helped her with such a seemingly minor thing almost immediately left his mind, and he went on with his life.

 

Fast forward about 40 years…

 

The other day he got a private message from a lady on Facebook, asking if he was the same Ziskind Reckles that helped a Shoshana Greenberg fill out some forms for college.

 

After confirming with her that he was the very same Ziskind Reckles that collected money from her family, she was astounded that she had found him. I mean, really? How many people with this name could possibly exist in the world? It’s not like his name was John Smith, or Moishe Silverman.

 

She told him the reason she was contacting him 40 years later.

 

She wanted to thank him for having taken the time to help her fill out the college forms. She had never forgotten his good deed, and wanted to let him know how it helped change her life.

 

Because he had filled out those forms for her, she told him, she was able to go to college. She got her Bachelor’s degree in Biology, and then continued to earn her Master’s in something that I can’t remember.

 

She had a successful and fulfilling career as a research scientist for a large research company. Because of her success, she had been able to give her children the life she didn’t have. They, too, went to college and are working in respectable fields.

 

Now, 40 years later, with her retirement only weeks away, she wanted to reach out to the man who had started it all for her. She couldn’t thank him enough for what he had done for her.

 

Wow.

 

Imagine. Just a few minutes of his time literally put her life on another path altogether.

 

What a profound lesson.

 

We can’t possibly see the long-term effects of a good deed. Even the simplest act of kindness can be so great, so far-reaching, that we should appreciate every opportunity we get to help others; and every bit of help we receive.

 

And I hate to be a bubble burster, but the same goes for those bad things we do. We can’t even begin to imagine the cobweb of hurt that we initialize by saying or doing something hurtful, even if it’s unintentional or we think it’s not a big deal. One bad mood causes another, as I like to say. Actually, I just came up with that phrase, but I think it’s awesome!

 

OH, and of course, one more very important thing. Shoshana showed incredible hakarat hatov (gratitude.) She never forgot the kindness Ziskind did for her, and she made the effort to thank him.

 

If anyone has ever done you a favor and you haven’t properly thanked them, don’t wait another minute! Send them a personal IM on Facebook or a warm What’sApp. If you really feel like going out of your way, you can even *gasp* call them.

 

And one last thing, I promise. Our Father, our Creator, The One Who sustains us and provides for us every single second of our lives – show Him some love, too. Because G-d knows we’re all severely lacking in this “Thank You” department.

 

But no worries! The Garden of Gratitude will help you remember to thank Hashem, your family, and everyone else who has ever done you a shred of good. I’m sure everyone will be happy to receive a nice thanks before 40 years go by!