To Tell The Truth
The tzaddik sighed as he contemplated the sorry state of his spiritual affairs. Then suddenly a “new” thought occurred to him, and his downcast features...
When the month of Elul comes around Jews throughout the world begin a period of intense introspection in preparation for the High Holidays of Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. Deeds are examined, as are thoughts. Frayed relationships are mended, while resolutions for improved behavior are made.
Yet in days gone by, simple Jews – as well as not so simple Jews – did not wait for Elul to begin this process of cheshbon nefesh, or accounting of the soul. Every day was an opportunity to make amends for any transgressions that might have been made during that twenty-four hour period. And it was not uncommon for people to keep a little spiritual account book handy so that they could track their spiritual progress as carefully as they followed the ups and downs of their financial transactions.
One of those Jews who made a point of examining his deeds every day was the great Chassidic master Rebbe Levi Yitzchak of Berditchev. Before he would go to sleep he would look back over the events of the day with an unflinchingly truthful eye. If by chance he had done something – or said something – that he now regretted, he would weep and make a firm resolution to improve his ways.
“Levi Yitzchak will not do that again,” he assured himself.
Yet this feeling of strong resolution did not last long. Suddenly the tzaddik (righteous person) was overcome by yet another wave of strong regret and the tears were once again flowing freely from his eyes.
“Didn’t Levi Yitzchak say the same thing yesterday?” he chided himself. “And look what has become of his fine resolutions!”
The tzaddik sighed as he contemplated the sorry state of his spiritual affairs. Then suddenly a “new” thought would occur to him, and his downcast features were transformed into a beaming smile.
“Yesterday Levi Yitzchak did not speak the truth,” he called out with triumph. “But today Levi Yitzchak really means what he says. He will change, and he won’t commit that transgression again!”
Thus assured the tzaddik could go to bed with a clear conscience and be confident that the next morning he would be able to make a fresh start.
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Libi Astaire is the author of Choose Light! Chassidic Tales for Chanukah, Rosh Hashanah, Sukkos, Passover & Shavuos; Breakfast with Rav Zusha and Other Stories to Wake Up Your Soul; and the award-winning Jewish Regency Mystery Series. Visit her website for more information about these and other books.
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