Fallen Idols

I had just finished reading Howard Morton’s informative article, “Murky Waters”, in which he discussed his teenage obsession with Pink Floyd. Like 99.9% of the teenagers in the world, he had his particular idols that he worshiped; his favorite being Roger Waters. When Howard discovered that Mr. Waters despised Jews and was siding with terrorists, his fantasy image of Waters deflated faster than a balloon flying across the room. Needless to say, Waters’ heroic persona was dead in Howard’s eyes. I’m sure it was a painful death.

This incident made me think about the ridiculously high moral pedestal that we place famous people on. What does being disgustingly rich and world-renowned have anything to do with high moral character? Does each extra million dollars magically add to their ethical conduct? I don’t sseeenk so. (I’m an Israeli now, remember?)

Once upon a time, I, too, was a teenager. I had my fair share of teenage obsessions, mainly Jason Priestly (those dreamy eyes!!) and Eddie Vedder. Like Howard’s room, my room was also decorated with posters and pictures of various sizes of these two hunks, with an occasional blonde (male!) Calvin Klein model thrown in for variety.  Amazingly, my parents never bothered me about the hormone-crazed, male museum that was going on in my room.

The question is, why not?

Like most parents, they simply assumed that this is typical teenage girl behavior. And they were right. It was typical teenage girl behavior. What I have noticed, however, is that over the past 15 years, the behavior hasn’t changed as much as the role models have. Looking back, my obsessions were more or less non-violent and generally clean-cut. Except for Vanilla Ice. He was just one huge mistake. I’m ashamed to say that I had him on my closet door, shaved eyebrows and all.

Let’s look at what’s going on today. I mean, really look at it. Parents, take a walk (if you dare) through your teenagers’ bedrooms. Try to ignore the smell of stinky socks and putrefying food emanating from somewhere beneath the mattress. Who do you see? Do you see rock stars like Marylin Manson, who glorify death and torture? Do you see rap stars like Jay Z, who glorify drugs and violence?

And we can’t leave out the female idols; namely, my most un-favorite, Lady Gaga. She is arguably the heroin of this generation, from teeny boppers to adults in their 30’s. To me, she is a bigger fool than the misguided people that look up to her. She has sold herself out and turned herself into nothing more than a singing, dancing puppet, who will stoop to unthinkable lows at the requests of her producers and managers.

Though it may seem like a phase that most teenagers will grow out of, I wonder why most parents have accepted this obsession with the wrong types of people. What do people think their kids are mentally absorbing when they’re listening to lyrics of how one guy murdered another over drugs, or another guy boasting of how many women he slept with last night??

Why do we allow ourselves to look up to these people?!

What does it say about us? About our morals? We talk so righteously about how it’s important to do the right thing, to be a good person, blah, blah, blah… Is this the way we’re really living? How can we expect our kids to have high moral standards when they’re idol worshiping people that would do things even an animal wouldn’t do?

For example, if we want to teach our young men to respect women, how can we allow them to watch music videos (and any program on T.V. for that matter) that sexually exploit and degrade women to the point of an object to be used for a man’s pleasure and then discarded like last night’s leftovers?

How can we expect girls to protect their purity when they’re reading trash like “Cosmopolitan” and learning about the top ten erogenous zones on a man’s body, while trying to figure out which method of birth control is right for them?

Our children have been stolen from us! Their innocence has been stolen from them!

Where are the larger-than-life posters of real heroes, like Dr. Stainslaw Burzynski, who discovered the cure for cancer thirty years ago? What about all of the selfless people who volunteer at hospitals, hospices, and food drives? Why don’t we see their smiles plastered across billboards? Where can we find a popular magazine with teachers on its cover?  Many teachers actually do care about the next generation; much unlike the selfish, Rolls Royce-driving basketball players who don’t give a second thought to the poverty-stricken projects they left behind…

Honestly, I don’t know what parents should do about this predicament. At the slightest attempt of discipline, most teenagers rebel. I’m aware of that. Maybe, at the very least, the thing to do might be to progressively add positive role models into the mix. G-d forbid you shock their systems with too much positivity and wholesomeness!

Here are a few suggestions: direct them to any lecture by Rabbi Brody on YouTube. That way they can still maintain some sense of coolness while watching it. It might be too much to send them straight to the Breslev website. You could also give them an emuna CD in English to listen to in the privacy of their car- their friends will never know! If your kids seem really open and receptive, you could even give them – dare I say it – a book, like “The Garden of Emuna”.

Last but not least- you can be your child’s role model as well. In fact, you already are, whether you like it or not. A parent’s actions and behavior leave a lifelong impression on their child; why not do your best to make sure your actions are positive? If you need more guidance on this (and all parents do), read “Garden of Education”- next thing you know, it could be your picture hanging up on your teenager’s wall!

NOT!!