Waiting for Mashiach
We are commanded to anticipate Mashiach every single day; it’s a mitzvah no less important than keeping Shabbat and kosher and avoiding lashon hara...
You know, I’ve been ‘actively’ expecting Mashiach to come for over five years now. Expecting that Mashiach would come (and that the war of Gog and Magog would kick off any minute) was a major factor influencing us to make aliyah.
As soon as I got off the plane on August 16, 2005, I expected that Mashiach would be announced literally any day. Don’t forget, it was the time that Gush Katif was being destroyed, and many, many other people also felt that something that ‘big’ couldn’t be happening without it leading directly to the unveiling of Mashiach.
But Mashiach didn’t come, all the hubbub over Gush Katif died down (at least, for the onlookers; most of the Gush Katifers themselves are still living in caravans) and I discovered that ‘actively’ expecting Mashiach to come every day is actually quite a hard thing to maintain.Then it was Lebanon 2, and I was sure Mashiach was coming. I lived in a part of Israel where no missiles were falling, and where very few families had anyone serving in the army. So we listened to the news reports and read the papers, but I could have been reading about a conflict in the deepest depths of Africa, for all it was actually impacting my own life.
It was so strange. A war happening, affecting millions of people in my own country, and it was just another news snippet on CNN. It’s only when we hosted a family from Tzfat, who had been driving around the country for four weeks trying to escape from the rockets, that it started to be ‘real’ in any real way.
But then, all the hubbub died down, and I realized that ‘actively’ expecting Mashiach to come every day when you’d had a couple of disappointments already was actually very difficult.
For a few months, I struggled to find the balance between expecting Mashiach to come – which would change just about every facet of my life and the world as we know it – and continuing on with ‘normal’ life in real time.
We are commanded to anticipate Mashiach every single day; it’s a mitzvah no less important than keeping Shabbat and kosher and avoiding lashon hara. But practically speaking, it takes an awful lot of siyatta dishemaya, because any ‘real’ expectation that isn’t fulfilled can very quickly lead to disillusionment and disappointment.
I have gone through that a bit myself, each time that Hashem appears to be taking the world to the edge, then bringing it back. He took us to the edge with Gush Katif; again with Lebanon 2; again with the financial crises of two years ago – where I was certain all the banks were about the fail – again with operation Cast Lead in Gaza, last year.
Each time, a bit of me feels: ‘this is it! The catalyst for Mashiach!” And then it isn’t, or at least, not in a way that I can notice. But like so many things in life, trying to ‘actively’ anticipate Mashiach has taught me patience, if nothing else.
And then, I think of all the wonderful Jews who got closer to Hashem since Gush Katif, who made aliyah, who strengthened their commitment to Torah, and I realize that Mashiach is still on the way, albeit, in his own good time.
Why this long, drawn-out process? Why does Hashem take us all to the edge of potential chaos and destruction – and ultimate geula – just to pull us back from it, time and time again?
The answer has to be, because it’s a kindness from Hashem. Hashem wants us to see how fragile our ‘solid’ world really is, so that more and more of us can try to see past it, and to start to understand what we are really down here for.
Each ‘shake’ certainly wakes someone up; and every additional ‘someone’ is so precious to Hashem, He’s even willing to hold off the Final Redemption to ensure that the maximum number of people can participate in it.
In the meantime, I’ve found that I’ve developed a sort of ‘two track’ brain; one part of my brain plans camping trips in August, family visits in December and Bat Mitzvahs in three years’ time. The other part of my brain is constantly scanning for Mashiach; yes, we’ll try to go up North for a couple of days in Summer – if Mashiach hasn’t come by then. Yes, it will be great to have my parents stay for a week in December – hopefully Mashiach will have come by then. Yes, it would be wonderful if Hashem could show me what He’d like to do with the rest of my life – but hopefully Mashiach will be here very soon and it will all be a moot point anyway.
The times when the balance is ‘out’ – when I start to forget about Mashiach and redemption, or when it starts to feel like it simply isn’t going to happen any time soon, G-d forbid, Hashem always sends me a reminder, to make me yearn for Mashiach again. Like an acquaintance’s serious illness, or premature death, or terrible shalom bayit issues, may G-d save us from all these horrible things.
Likewise, when I get too caught up in hoping that Mashiach is coming right now Hashem will balance me out with a trip to Jerusalem, or an outing with my kids, or a nice conversation, where I see that there is so much ‘good’ in my world even today, even now, that it makes the waiting for Mashiach bearable again.
I haven’t been out of the country for three years, apart from a brief trip to Uman, because I’m waiting for Mashiach to come. Every time my husband has to go abroad for business, I’m on shpilkes (pins and needles) waiting for him to get back, because I’m also waiting for Mashiach to come, and I don’t want him to be in Galut when it happens.
Every time I talk to my friends and family abroad, I try to encourage them to at least to want to be in Israel, because Mashiach is coming, and at least earnestly wanting to be in Israel is enough to tip the balance in their favor.
I can’t tell you it’s easy, or even enjoyable, actively waiting for Mashiach to come. But it’s what Hashem wants each and every one of us to do; not to say that ‘today is definitely the day’ and then fall into disappointment and despair when it doesn’t happen. But to say ‘today could be the day’, and then live out the next 24 hours waiting to see if it really will be. And in the meantime, I must be happy with my lot, whether Mashiach is here or not.
As my husband so succinctly put it when we were discussing Mashiach’s ‘no show’ up to this point: “Hashem doesn’t want us to want Mashiach because that will make everything ‘good’. Everything is already ‘good’; but when Mashiach does finally come, it will be even better.”
1/10/2011
Not All Converts Have Converted Yet After Moshiach comes, there will be no more converts. This is because everyone who knows Judaism is where they belong will convert before Moshiach. However, with the difficulties being thrown down by the Orthodox now, it's becoming EXTREMELY difficult to convert, and then only to make aliyah to find that the convert is not accepted as a Jew, not Jewish enough – even with an Orthodox conversion. Rectify this FIRST, then look for Moshiach.
1/10/2011
After Moshiach comes, there will be no more converts. This is because everyone who knows Judaism is where they belong will convert before Moshiach. However, with the difficulties being thrown down by the Orthodox now, it's becoming EXTREMELY difficult to convert, and then only to make aliyah to find that the convert is not accepted as a Jew, not Jewish enough – even with an Orthodox conversion. Rectify this FIRST, then look for Moshiach.
12/21/2010
WOW! IT’S AS IF YOU WROTE WHAT IS ON MY MIND! Rivka, GREAT article, especially as you wrote EXACTLY as I'm living my life. This past summer, someone asked me what I'm doing for vacation? I looked at him a bit strangely and answered with a very straight face: "Vacation? How could I take vacation & go away? Mashi'ach is coming! I'm waiting for him!". This is how I'm living every day…. it's become more intense since returning for good in 2007. I breathe, eat, drink, think, speak, dream, talk, write, etc., about Mashi'ach coming… about the rebuilding of the most beautiful Beit HaMikdash with HKB"H's shechinah on Har HaBayit with the Kohanim doing their Avodah and bringing Korbanot & the Leviyim singing and Am Yisrael being able to come to Beit Elokeinu… We'd have our Melech from Beit David and finally… the Geulah Shelaimah. What a beautiful picture!! I think about it almost daily. You can't imagine how much I cry for Mashiach and the Geulah! I live daily thinking that THIS will be the day that Mashiach will reveal himself and I just can't move on with my life. Occasionally, someone or something distracts me from these thoughts. I, too, try to convince all my relatives and close friends to hurry and make aliyah before Mashiach arrives!