Don’t Blame Yourself
How many times do you wake up in the morning with a long list of plans and good intentions, and then all of a sudden...
We continue with the Ten Lessons of the Flakefoot Falcon as we learn how to acquire the art of being at peace with ourselves.
Lesson Number one: Look for your good points
Lesson Number two: Separate your weak points
Lesson Number three/four: The weaknesses are a blessing
Lesson Number four: To judge yourself fairly
Lesson Number five/six: Utilize your talents
Lesson Number seven: Say hello to swindling SAM
Lesson Number Eight: Don't blame yourself for your setbacks. Conversely, don't take the credit for your successes. Just do the best you can with the tools you have.
Lesson Number Six spoke about the consolations and hidden blessings of failure. Let's examine success and failure from a different viewpoint.
The Kabbalists say that a person's only option in life is the choice between good and evil; the rest is in God's hands.
How many times do you wake up in the morning with a long list of plans and good intentions, and then all of a sudden:
* The car breaks down, and you end up spending half the day in the garage.
* The school secretary calls to inform you that one of your child is sick, so you leave work, run to the school, chase to your family doctor, then to the pharmacy, and devote the remainder of your day to nursing a sick child.
* Your computer begins rattling, and then blanks out. Your PC technician arrives, and informs you that you need a new hard disk.
* The wall between the bathroom and your bedroom has a gigantic moisture stain. The plumber arrives, and discovers a cracked pipe. You have to stay home while the plumber breaks down half the wall to fix the pipe.
On the other hand…
* A caller from Japan received your name and phone number from the Web. Your product or service is exactly what he needs. Within four hours, a million-dollar advance is wired to your bank from Tokyo, and your business trebles overnight.
* You're worried about the economy and the rise in unemployment, especially in your field. Suddenly, with no initiative of your own, you receive a phone call from a leading firm, offering you a job that suits your talents perfectly, at a salary 50% higher than what you dreamed of earning.
* You're the quarterback: It's the fourth quarter, with less than one minute left in the game, and your team is trailing by three points. The ball's on your own twenty-yard line, at third down with eight yards to go. A second after the hike, all you can see is a thousand-pound wall of defensive linemen that's about to make a pancake out of you. You have no idea if you have a receiver down field or not. You make a blind throw with all your might, and then get pounced on. The wind's knocked out of you, but you hear sixty thousand delirious fans calling your name. Your tight end caught the ball, and carried it another ten yards into the other team's end zone. You win.
* Interest rates are on the rise, and it's a buyer's market. Three different realtors tell you that your house won't bring more than $230,000. Before you have a chance to place a private ad in the newspaper, someone knocks on your door and offers you $280,000 cash for your house.
The victim in each of the four setback examples had nothing to do with the day's misfortune. Conversely, the four "jackpot winners" in the success stories would be daftly arrogant to claim credit for their achievements.
My graduating class from rabbinical seminary in Jerusalem consisted of twelve newly ordained rabbis. One of the best young men in the group wrote thirty-two different job applications; two answered with a flimsy "maybe" that never materialized, eighteen sent rejections, and twelve didn't bother replying. One of the mediocre members of the class, with no effort on his own, received a superb position in Australia. How many times have you seen similar phenomena in your own life?
Here's another remarkable occurrence: Gary Barrett[1], halfback on the varsity football team, Phi Beta Kappa, and the most handsome student on campus, had every other female at the University of North Carolina in Chapel Hill literally falling at his feet. Ultimately, he married a girl who suffered from Polio as a child, and was left with a crippled left leg. All the cheerleaders and the sorority beauty queens were both astounded and heartbroken, asking one another, "What does he see in her?" Gary's reaction: "She's all I've ever wanted". Thirty years later, Gary's as happily married as ever, a father of three superb sons and an outstanding daughter, and a grandfather.
Once we've earnestly done our best, the outcome of our efforts is beyond our control. God has a master plan for running the world, which includes every single detail in the universe, from the fate of major governments to the food of a flea. Each of us receives a unique set of skills that enables us to fulfill our role in society.
Although we can't determine success or failure, we certainly are free to choose between good and evil. God created the world with a perfect balance between good and evil, in order to assure a person's free will, since the notion of reward and punishment are senseless in a context of coercion.
The more we develop spiritual awareness, the more we see God's fingerprints on everything we do. The more we realize God's fatherly intervention in our daily lives, the less we worry. The less we worry, the more we can channel our energies into utilizing the tools that God grants to each of us. The more we utilize our tools for the best, the more we live at peace with ourselves. When we live at peace with ourselves, it's a lot easier to live at peace with everyone around us.
To be continued . . .
(The Trail to Tranquility is available in the Breslev Store.)
* * *
[1] Names and circumstances changed.
Tell us what you think!
Thank you for your comment!
It will be published after approval by the Editor.