The Garden of Smiley Faces

It’s been a while since my last installment in my acclaimed “Garden” series. But this issue has been well worth the wait, because the information I’m about to share with you is so fantastic, so easy to use, and so totally life-changing.

 

A few weeks ago, I happened to notice a book that David must have ordered without my permission knowledge. But you should be proud of me – I didn’t react as expected and get angry! Because why would I get angry when I can get even?

 

Instead, I stole his book from him and started reading it. I don’t know why, but I do that all the time. It’s like a bad habit. I can’t help myself.

 

So, this amazing book is, like so totally… amazing!

 

It’s a famous book that’s been around for a looong time, and you may know it as How to Win Friends and Influence People by the brilliant Dale Carnegie.

 

I can’t believe I’ve never read this book before, and I’m absolutely in awe of what I’ve read so far. I highly suggest that you read this book if you haven’t yet done so.

 

What I found super interesting, aside from the great info in the book, was how similar Mr. Carnegie’s understanding of human behavior and subsequent advice is to Rav Arush’s life-changing books. It’s like Carnegie was a secret student of Rebbe Nachman. Really unbelievable.

 

One chapter actually made me turn back to the front cover to look for hidden payos (sidecurls) because Carnegie’s advice was so spot-on the Rebbe Nachman/Rav Arush combo.

 

In this chapter, he discusses how a person should make a good first impression, which incidentally is a great way to make people like you. Or so Carnegie says. I mean, it’s not always true because David made a horrible first impression on me and I still married him.

 

So, what’s his advice already?

 

In one word… SMILE.

 

I know, right?! Mind-blowing similarity!

 

Here are a few parts of the book that were so good, I just had to share:

 

One guy was a sour-faced businessman. He referred to himself as “one of the worst grouches who ever walked down Broadway”. He didn’t even smile at his wife of 18 years! How she didn’t kill him is a mystery to me.

 

He was at one of Carnegie’s lectures, where he was told to smile at someone every hour of the day. So, the next morning, he decided that he would force himself to smile. Now this was no easy task for someone with such a miserable personality!

 

But, he did it, and the results were astounding. His wife nearly fainted from shock that morning, and throughout the day, he noticed that people were actually smiling back at him!

 

What’s even more amazing is how the practice of smiling actually began to change his personality.

 

He noticed that he was making more friendly small talk with others.

 

He noticed that he had more patience for people at work when they came to him with problems and complaints.

 

He noticed that he was in a good mood all day long.

 

He even noticed that he began to criticize others less, and eventually he stopped criticizing altogether.

 

All of these life-altering changes came simply from smiling.

 

Is that not incredible? And slightly unbelievable? I mean, let’s be honest.

 

But if you think he’s a one-off example, Professor William James of Harvard explained: “Action seems to follow feeling, but really action and feeling go together; and by regulating the action, which is under more direct control of the will, we can indirectly regulate the feeling, which is not.”

 

WOW.

 

Is this not exactly Rebbe Nachman?? With some secular psychological analysis?

 

And it gets even better!

 

I’m just going to quote Carnegie because he writes so similarly to Rav Arush:

 

“You don’t feel like smiling? Then what? Two things. First, you force yourself to smile. If you are alone, force yourself to whistle or hum a tune or sing. Act as if you were already happy, and that will tend to make you happy.

 

“It isn’t what you have or who you are or where you are or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy. It is what you think about it.”

 

It seems that President Lincoln was a hidden Breslever, too. He said, “most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.”

 

It’s so true, y’all. You’re happy only if you choose to be happy. There’s no shortcut to getting happy.

 

Do yourself a favor and take Rebbe Nachman’s, Rav Arush’s, and Dale Carnegiestein’s advice.

 

Get yo’ smiley face on.

 

Your life depends on it.

 

If you need more help learning how to turn that frown upside down, read The Garden of Gratitude. Nothing makes you happy like a little or a lot of gratitude.

 

That’s it. I’ve decided to make Mr. Carnegie an honorary Breslever. You’ll see why in the next volume of my “Garden” series!